Self-reg - Not just for kids Part 2

Last week's post on 'self-regulation - not just for kids' got a lot of traffic and was one of the blogs featured on Doug Peterson and Stephen Hurley's podcast of This Week in Ontario Edublogs.  You can listen to the podcast here or read a summary of the five blogs featured on Doug's website.  I find that This Week in Ontario Edublogs (#TWIOE) is a great resource for finding blogs that I would probably otherwise miss.

In my blog post I described a time when my husband John and I were travelling and after 24 hours and three flights had finally arrived at the apartment we would be living at for the next 6 weeks in Cordoba, Argentina. It was late at night, the security guard wouldn't let us in, when we finally did get in the apartment was super small, and when we went for a walk to find something to eat there were no restaurants in our neighbourhood.  I was on the verve of losing it, and I described how John was able to 'lend me his calm.' 

During the podcast, Stephen wondered 'what would this look like in a classroom of 20 or even 30 students?'  What a great question!
The short answer - we slow down our language, modulate our voice, and be very present for that child.

The long answer - I'll try to answer it here using the five steps of Shanker Self-Reg, although to answer it thoroughly would be a book not a blog post.

Reframe the behaviour - in a classroom, it means thinking about children's behaviour and asking ourselves, "Is this misbehaviour or is this stress behaviour?"  If it's misbehaviour, then the child is still in control (using their prefrontal cortex) and we can reason with them.  If it's stress behaviour, then their limbic system is running the show. They are in fight, flight or freeze.  This is when they need us to co-regulate with them, and lend them our calm.

Recognize the stressors - stressors are different for each person each day so determining what the stressors are can be challenging.  We want to teach kids to be able to recognize stressors so they can eventually do the five steps of self-reg on their own.  The first stressors to check are the biological stressors - hungry, tired, cold students are already so stressed they can't deal with the additional cognitive, emotional and social stressors of school.

Remove stressors - we do this by having breakfast and snack programs, by turning down some of the bright, buzzing florescent lights in our classrooms. We do this by providing flexible seating options, by allowing kids to take a break for a moment, to get up and stretch. I can't go to a conference and sit in a hard chair from 9 am to 3 pm without taking breaks so why would I expect kids to be able to do that?  I used to teach 29 grade four students in a portable.  It was noisy and some students were stressed by the noise so I had old headphones available that they could wear. The headphones weren't connected to anything but they helped block the noise for those students.  MEHRIT Centre has a free list of classroom modifications available for teachers.

Reflect - if we want kids to be able to self-regulate so that they can be 'calm, alert and ready to learn' then they have to know what calm feels like.  In today's hyper-busy world, a lot of people don't have much calm in their lives.

Restore - we need students to be aware of what is calming for them.  We can help them by co-regulating and lending them our calm, but we want them to find what works for them so they can bring themselves back to calm.  We can introduce them to mindfulness techniques like breathing exercises and have sensory materials available in our classroom for student use.  What works will be different for each child, and what works one day may not work another day.  This is the same for adults. Some people find meditation reduces stress, others don't.  So a whole class meditation moment after recess may reduce stress for a small percentage of your students and help them to calm down and get ready to learn, but may actually increase stress for other students (hence the silliness). When introducing these restorative practices to your class, it helps to preface it with 'this is something that some of you might find helps you to stay calm so you are ready to learn.' A good example of this are the fidget spinners that were so popular. For some students they were a tool to help them focus.  For other kids, they were a distraction.

Using a Frayer Model

In an earlier post, I wrote about using Mind Maps as a tool for organizing my thinking on complex topics and tasks.  Graphic organizers were something that I certainly had my students use frequently over the years but didn't use for my own learning very often.

This week I decided to explore using graphic organizers in the self-reg course that I'm taking through the MEHRIT Centre. The goal of Shanker Self-Reg is to help children and adults recognize and reduce the stressors in their lives so that they can be 'Calm, Alert and Ready to Learn.'

One of the challenges working with people in today's hyper stressed society is that we don't even know what calm is any more. Some people use screen time to feel calm but that's mindlessness.  Calm means being aware of what's going on inside and outside of you, not tuning out with screens or alcohol.

After some reflection, I decided to use a Frayer Model to explore the concept of calm. In the one I used the four quadrants are:
Definition in Your Own Words
Characteristics
Examples
Non-examples

Instead of Characteristics you can use this quadrant to draw an image that represents the concept, in this case calm.  I like using images because that is the one area where I find the answers from person to person, or group to group, really change. In workshops, after the groups have completed their Frayer Models, we provide time for participants to do a gallery walk and look at each other's work.  What is the same? What is different?

I've used Frayer Models with adult learners in workshops for concepts like self-regulation, mentor, and teacher.  A colleague was saying the other day that people confuse inquiry learning with collaborative inquiry so it might be interesting to do a Frayer for collaborative inquiry with a group as a culminating activity.

What graphic organizers do you like to use with adult learners? With students?  I envision using it for exploring vocabulary in science - biology, experiment - or social studies - democracy; history; citizenship.  I can see using it for discussions at the beginning of the year for concepts like responsibility, respect or friendship.

What are your experiences using the Frayer Model?

What if.....

There are many different ways we can create opportunities to discuss our passions with other educators and parents. Our challenge in the self-reg Level 2 course was to create a What if... statement that could be used to spark dialogue or reflection on the stress awareness of others using any format we chose.  I was stumped.  Usually I relish the opportunity to be creative and have fun demonstrating my learning but it took me awhile to come up with a format.  Eventually I settled on this graphic, inspired by the many graphics available for free on the MEHRIT centre website.

What is your 'what if' statement?

(image from https://www.123rf.com/stock-photo/rain_pond.html)

Stress reducing strategies & thinking about positive stress

We were challenged to visually share what we have learned about dealing with stress through self-regulation, and I created two photo collages using online images and PicCollage.  In the first collage are strategies I used to deal with stress before I started this self-reg journey. Often at work, around 2 in the afternoon, I found myself heading upstairs to the vending machine to get a Diet Coke and some junk food to help me power through the afternoon when I was feeling physically and mentally exhausted.  When I got home, I would often mindlessly watch TV and cruise social media, and/or look forward to one (or several) glasses of red wine to relax. 

After starting this self-reg journey, I have healthier ways to deal with stress.  One of my go-to stress relievers is exercise and this is a good example, I think, of the positive stress that Stuart Shanker and Susan Hopkins talk about in some of the MEHRIT centre videos and programs.  I run a half marathon each fall as a motivator to stick with my running program.  I could run 5K a few times a week and that would still be a bonus for my health and help me reduce stress.  But I find the positive stress of setting this big culminating exercise goal is exciting at the same time as it is scary.  I create a 16 week training plan, make sure I'm eating healthy, do my exercises to keep all my joints healthy, and so on.  On race day, I'll be nervous right up until I cross the start line and then, as crazy as it sounds to anyone who's never done it, it's actually FUN!  The last 5K are usually the longest but crossing the finish line and achieving a goal I had to work so hard for make it all worth it. Every year I say I'm never going to do it again.  And then, on New Year's Eve there is a discount for early registration and I find myself signing up for another year!  This year I'm running with my youngest daughter (her first half marathon) and my husband, which makes it even more fun.

When we are talking about stress with parents and students, we need to ensure that we talk about positive stress so that we can counter the image of stress in popular culture where stress is always bad.

Other strategies I use now include taking a walk break when I've been at my desk too long and getting some fresh air, eating more healthy foods and less junk food and setting priorities and then focusing on what's important.  (still red wine and some junk food but in moderation!)  

Before self-reg: Diet coke; junk food; red wine and mindless screen time; 

After self-reg: Exercise; fresh air; eating healthy foods; prioritizing tasks 

Photo credits:

Diet coke - onlinecashandcarry.com

Vending machine - costco.ca

Watching TV - shutter stock photo

Red wine - pinterest.com

Exercise - watchfit.com

Fresh air - shutter stock.com

Eating healthy - food.ndtv.co

Prioritize - process.st

My Top 10 No Cost Stress Reducers

For our self-regulation course at the MEHRIT centre we were recently challenged to create a top ten list of our favourite no-cost stress reducers.  Here's my list.  Please share your list on Twitter and tag me @lisacran.  Thanks!

• Exercise – whether it’s going for a run or doing some heavy work in the yard (two days ago I tore out the flagstone path) I find that physical work gives me a much needed break from the mental stress of studying, reading and writing
• Eating healthy – my husband travels frequently for work and is usually gone for two weeks at a time.  I’m not always motivated to make healthy meals for just me but after a few days of poor meals I feel lethargic.  Eating healthy is an easy way to reduce biological stressors for me. And if I am hungry I am very cranky and miserable so eating healthy will reduce stressors for people who have to deal with me.
• Fresh air – getting outside, breathing the fresh air, and focusing on slowing down my breathing. When I was working at the board office, a group of us in the program department decided we would take a 15 minute walking break each morning and afternoon.  It didn’t always happen, but usually someone would do a quick walk around the office around 10 and 2 asking who was going for a walk. Otherwise it was easy to spend the whole day in your office!
• Listening to the waves – we recently moved to our ‘retirement home’ on Lake Erie. Opening the door and listening to the waves helps me to relax
• Birds – usually watching the birds at the birdfeeder, especially the little hummingbirds, is quite destressing but right now the blue jay is screaming for breakfast
• Campfires – there’s a firepit at our new home.  Sitting outside in the evening, listening to the water and watching the fire is free destressor.  No checking emails, reading articles at the campfire.
• Drink more water -  At work, I used to keep a refillable water bottle on my desk and drink two bottles of water each day.  When I retired, I got out of that habit and found I was often dehydrated.
• Be social - Our new home is on a private, unpaved road and many of the homes here are summer homes/cottages so it would be easy to isolate yourself out here.  I make an effort to visit with the neighbours beside me each day and I’m looking into signing up for a book club at the local library. Otherwise, with John travelling for work, I can see how it might get very lonely out here in the winter.
• Prioritize and focus – this is hard for me.  If I’m working on my doctorate then I feel like I’m not spending enough time on the house and my family and this course. If I’m spending lots of time with my family then I feel like I’m falling behind with my coursework. It’s an ongoing battle to remind myself to focus on what I’m doing instead of being distracted thinking about other things I could/should be doing.
• Self-talk –  I use self-talk to encourage myself to focus, and to remind myself to use the other strategies listed here.

Kindness - It Starts with Us

I've seen this image, and versions of it, all over social media lately:

But  here's the thing.  As parents, as teachers we have to show our students how to be kind not just tell them.  If we want our kids, our students to sit with the lonely kid in the cafeteria, then we have to do that ourselves.

As an itinerant teacher for several years, I was at a different school each day.  I also worked as a supply teacher for a year.

There were some schools I went to where I felt like the lonely kid in the cafeteria.  At one school, no one ate in the staff room.  Just me.  I had no idea where everyone else was, but I sat at the table in this HUGE room all by myself and ate my lunch.

At another school, it was like high school all over again.  The male staff sat together in one area of the staff room. Primary teachers sat at another table.  Everyone had their clique and I remember how anxious I felt as I wondered where I should sit.  No one invited me to join them, so I sat down and hoped I wouldn't be asked to move.  Don't laugh; I've seen teachers tell itinerants and occasional teachers to move because 'that's my spot.'

One itinerant teacher told me about when she was invited to attend a staff meeting at a school where she felt she had a good relationship with the staff.  She arrived early and sat at a table.  Slowly teachers arrived and begin to fill the tables around her.  Eventually the tables were all full, except hers.  She still sat alone. The next teacher to arrive approached her and asked, "Is this seat taken?"  She smiled and replied, "No," thinking that the teacher would sit down and join her.  Instead, the teacher took the chair and moved it so she could sit at another table.

Don't get me wrong, staff at many schools were warm and welcoming.  They invited me to join in their lunch groups and included me in their conversations. One school emailed me ahead of time to let me know that they were having a special teacher appreciation luncheon when I would be there for my next visit so 'don't bring a lunch because you're welcome to join us.' How nice is that!!!!

So if you say that you care less about whether kids are academically gifted and more about whether they sit with the lonely kid in the cafeteria, then be the teacher who welcomes the newbie to the staff room - the supply teacher, the itinerant, the new custodian, the secretary who is just here for a day, the high school, college or university student on placement.  As Gandhi  said, "Be the change you want to see in the world."

Moving is Stressful - Self-Reg in Action!

I haven't blogged in a while as we were busy with a move last month.  We sold our house in Walkerville and moved to a smaller home out on Lake Erie. Then we found out we'd moved to an internet 'dead zone.'  After many calls to multiple internet providers we were finally able to get back online.  Thanks Xplorenet!!!

This move gave me lots of opportunities to put what I've learned about reducing stress through self-reg into action!

We got the keys to our new house late on Monday, July 10.  The new owners of our house were taking possession on July 14th which was the only day I could book movers. So we had three days to get the new house ready for move in and to finish packing up everything to move out.  The tight timeline was definitely causing me stress and so my husband and I took specific steps to reduce the stress as much as possible.

1. Asking for help - When we arrived at the new house around 5:30 pm that Monday, we were shocked to find that the previous owner left all of her food in the fridge and freezer, junk in the drawers in the kitchen, bathrooms and dining room and tons of random 'stuff' in the garage. There were holes in the wall covered with duct tape that had been hidden behind furniture during our walkthrough. Outside, she left broken furniture and more garbage. So our planned celebration turned into a four hour cleaning session. Rather than get really upset, we dealt with the problem and contacted our agent and our real estate lawyer for advise on how to proceed.  I also posted on social media just to vent and received an offer of assistance from a friend who lives nearby.  Instead of saying 'oh no, that's okay' I said "THANK YOU" and she came over and scrubbed for hours. 

2. Monitoring energy/tension levels - instead of going by the clock, we went to bed when we were tired. Even if it was still daylight outside at 9 pm, if we were exhausted we went to bed instead of trying to push on through and stay awake a bit longer.

This is how I felt by Thursday night.  

3. Breaking tasks into manageable chunks - rather than be overwhelmed at the massive packing and unpacking that needed to be done this week, we set small incremental goals like setting up the bookshelves in the office on Saturday morning.  Okay, I was still overwhelmed during the week we packed and moved - definitely high tension/low energy by Thursday.  But unpacking has been at a much more manageable pace.

4.Eliminating some jobs. We usually like to cook most of our meals and eat healthy. This week, we picked up take out salads and simple meals at the grocery store. Our original plan was to eat out but we were too tired and too dirty to go out in public!

5. Stay hydrated! Since the water cooler/ice maker function on the fridge at the new house needs to be cleaned and also needs a new filter, and we had packed the Brita water filter somewhere, we bought a case of water for us and for the movers because it was really hot. I feel a bit guilty about having a recycling bin full of water bottles but it's only for one week and it was important for us to be hydrated. If I get dehydrated, I get really tired and cranky!

Here's the house when we got the keys - food in the fridge and freezer, holes in the wall.  She left the garbage (which we put in bags, not her) but took the TV antennae and the bathroom mirrors.  

Can't wait to post some 'after' pictures later this week.